Film Review: ‘We Are The Night’ (Wir sind die Nacht – 2010) Gives Vampires a New Lease on Vicious

 Drama, Fantasy, Germany, Horror, J. Felton, Thriller  2 Responses »
May 262011
 

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Vampires, it would seem, are no longer what they used to be. Actually that’s not true at all. Thanks to a certain franchise they have been dragged kicking and screaming into the mainstream, and devoured by a bloodthirsty public that are seemingly happy with whiny vampires. Fair play to them, they are what they are.

For me though vampires have always been a charming yet vicious breed. Growing up with Christopher Lee’s Dracula and Salem’s Lot and then later on Fright Night’s Jerry Dandridge (soon to be Farrellized in the remake), The Lost Boys and Near Dark. These were killers whichever way you sliced them Continue reading »

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Film Review: When a Cult Leaves You No Other Choice, It’s Time to ‘Drive Angry’ (2011)

 Action, Adventure, B. Harris, Demons, Exploitation, Fantasy, Horror, Revenge  No Responses »
May 172011
 

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Roaring up from the depths of hell, a damned soul named Milton (an allusion to John Milton?) returns to the world of mortal man with an unquenchable thirst for vengeance. Forced to spend his afterlife bearing witness to the suffering of his loved ones, Milton steals a legendary weapon and hits the road in search of a cult responsible for the murder of his daughter and the kidnapping of his granddaughter.

With law enforcement breathing down his neck and a mysterious denizen of the underworld named The Accountant dogging his every step, Milton and his road trip partner Piper must stay alive Continue reading »

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Film Review: Nishimura’s ‘Vampire Girl vs Frankenstein Girl’ (Revisited – 2009) Offers Gore Galore & More

 Action, Asian Cinema, Exploitation, Extreme, Fantasy, Horror, J. Felton, Japan, Martial Arts, Sci-Fi, Zombies  No Responses »
May 082011
 

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Within seconds of this movie starting a freakish looking girl gets her head peeled by a disembodied skull. If that doesn’t make you want to see more of this then you are probably already dead. Either that or warped over the top Japanese splatter isn’t your cup of tea. This opening scene sets the tone for the entire movie which gets more and more outrageous the further it goes. But really, what do you expect from a movie from a movie with this title?

To break the plot down would take far too long to go into detail, something I try to avoid anyway, as there is so much going on at any one time. However, the general jist of it is that Japanese Continue reading »

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Film Review: Richard Kelly’s Ambitious ‘Southland Tales’ (2006) Brings Sci-Fi to its Knees

 Comedy, Drama, Fantasy, Sci-Fi, Thriller  No Responses »
Apr 262011
 

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A friend and I were discussing the current trends of cinema this past summer and how few studios and filmmakers themselves were willing to take chances anymore and try to deliver something unique to audiences. Aside from Christopher Nolan’s Inception, it seemed that nearly every film that was being released suffered from a lack of ambition to not only entertain, but to engage the audience. At some point during this discourse, I had mentioned my admiration for Richard Kelly’s sophomore effort, Southland Tales. My friend described it as too much ambition. Although I saw my friend’s point, I view Southland Tales as a more coherent and effective cinematic experience than most give it credit for Continue reading »

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Film Review: Hardwicke’s Modern Retelling of ‘Red Riding Hood’ (2011) Delights Fantasy Viewers

 B. Woodell, Fantasy, Horror, Thriller  No Responses »
Apr 152011
 

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Red Riding Hood, the new film directed by Catherine Hardwicke, is an updated version of not only the Red Riding Hood fairy tale, but pretty much a hybrid of every child story dealing with the big bad wolf.

The film takes place in a medieval village that for years has sacrificed an animal on every full moon so the towns people would be safe from the werewolf that has haunted the city for years. One day the wolf kills a girl, who is Valerie’s (Amanda Seyfried) sister. It sets the town into a frenzy and they call in Father Solomon (Gary Oldman) to come to the town to rid them of the cursed wolf. He comes in and will stop at nothing to kill the wolf, and in Continue reading »

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Film Review: The Legendary Yuen Woo-ping’s ‘True Legend’ (2010) Not-So-Legendary Wuxia

 Action, Adventure, Asian Cinema, B. Harris, Drama, Fantasy, Hong Kong, Martial Arts, Revenge, Yuen Woo-ping  No Responses »
Apr 042011
 

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After leading an army into an enemy stronghold and rescuing his prince from execution, the great warrior General Su passes on a promotion to Governor of Hu Bei, instead graciously insisting the prince grant his adopted brother Yuan the honor. No longer interested in the thrill of battle, Su hopes to return home, start a family and open a school in which to teach Wushu.

Five years later, Governor Yuan pays an official visit to Su’s home on the day of his adopted father’s birthday intending to take his revenge on the old man for the execution of his biological father. Now a corrupt monster and Master of Five Venom Fists, Yuan unceremoniously dispatches the old man and takes his Continue reading »

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Film Review: ‘Howard the Duck’ (Revisited – 1986) – When a So-So Comic Sees a So-So Adaptation

 Action, Comedy, Fantasy, J. Kayy, Sci-Fi  No Responses »
Jan 192011
 

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Howard, a sarcastic humanoid duck is pulled from his home world and hurtled to Earth where he meets a young woman named Bev, as well as other weird characters. Now stranded on Earth, Howard must help his new found human friends stop an alien invasion.

What can one say about a film staring a talking duck? Epic? Amazing? Classic? Well thought out? HELL NO! When Howard came out in 1986 it tanked at the box office and, even later, on home video. Was it because Howard was a turkey? Well, at the time yes.

Director Willard Huyck and writer Gloria Katz seemed to have no idea how the events of the film should play out so the Continue reading »

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Film Review: ‘Wasteland Tales’ (2010) Resurrects the Post-Nuke Sub-Genre in Style

 Action, Adventure, Anthology, B. Harris, Exploitation, Fantasy, Martial Arts, Sci-Fi, Zombies  No Responses »
Dec 172010
 

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“The Last Warrior” – A deadly virus ravages the globe, killing all males on the planet. Now a desert wasteland, the world is filled with violent barbarian women all searching for one thing, The Last Warrior! One woman must defeat an entire tribe in order to free a mysterious prisoner, a prisoner that could very well be the last man on Earth! (Writer/Director: Shaky González)

“Eastern Army” – The world is in ruins after the apocalypse and there are only two kinds of survivors, the hunters and their prey. A loner wanders into a camp full of people filled with hope that he’s a member of the fabled Eastern Army, a new government Continue reading »

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Film Review: ‘Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale’ (2010) – Not All of Them Have Happy Endings

 Comedy, Fantasy, Horror, J. Felton  No Responses »
Dec 072010
 

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Let’s face it, the majority of movies that feature Christmas as its theme, whether they be horror or not, tend to play to the mass-marketed Western ideals of Christmas. That in main means a jolly fat old Santa Claus, all white beard and a red costume. In other words the Coca Cola Santa, a Santa that is relatively new in the grand scheme of things. What we don’t get is a story that plays on the origins of where Santa really came from, the Santa of Finnish folklore, the Santa that collected children and did less than pleasant things to them. Until now that is.

Set in the barren landscape of rural Finland Rare Exports begins with the excavation of an ancient burial site by an Continue reading »

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Film Review: Oshii’s ‘Assault Girls’ (Asaruto gâruzu – 2009) Both Delights and Befuddles

 Action, Asian Cinema, Fantasy, J. Kayy, Japan, Sci-Fi  No Responses »
Nov 222010
 

Theatrical Poster

In a virtual realm called Avalon, four mercenaries kill monsters in an effort to score points. When a common foe threatens to destroy Avalon and beyond, the mercs must join forces to fight as one.

When I heard director Mamoru Oshii had a new film coming I was very happy, to say the least. Oshii did two of my fave films, Ghost in the Shell and Angels Egg, and his style is beautiful and haunting. I know others find his work to be slow and that’s something I’m comfortable with.

Now the synopsis sounds like a lot of fun right? Sure, why not. Here lies the films 1st problem, there is very, and I mean very Continue reading »

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Film Review: ‘Ninja Pussy Cat’ (Kôshoku kunoichi: Aieki-zeme – 2003) is a True Perverts Ninja Film Fantasy

 Action, Adventure, Asian Cinema, B. Harris, Erotic, Exploitation, Fantasy, Japan, Revenge  No Responses »
Aug 272010
 

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The Fuma Clan have stumbled upon an explosive secret involving The Shogun of Japan and his son that may tear Japan apart but before they can move on the information, the treacherous Hattori Hanzo and his Iga Clan ninja descend upon Fuma village leaving death and destruction in their wake.

The last living Fuma Clan member and the Clan leader’s daughter must now work together to infiltrate the Iga Clan in order to collect a sample of Hanzo’s blood, establish a damning connection between The Shogun’s son and Hanzo and avenge their fallen comrades.

Lovers will die, plans will be formulated and the safety of a nation may very well rest upon the shoulders (and vagina) of the last of the Iga Clan Continue reading »

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Film Review: Cirio H. Santiago’s ‘Wheels of Fire’ (1985) is Pinoy Post-Nuke Platinum

 Action, B. Harris, Crime, Fantasy, Sci-Fi  No Responses »
Aug 202010
 

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Armageddon has arrived! Those damn politicians done went and blew themselves up leaving nothing but dry, arid wastelands populated by roving packs of nomads, scavengers and murderous motorcycle/car-driving bandits. Ineffectual to stop the mayhem, the splintered and self-serving government does nothing but control the flow of gasoline and attempt to unite tribes and towns into a cohesive states. That’s just the insanity above ground! Below the scorching sands dwells a subterranean society of cannibalistic, Morlock-like creatures called ‘Sand People’ that wait to snatch travelers that stray to far from base camp. What exactly do they want? Well, dinner is indeed served. Basically the future sucks all kinds of post-nuke balls Continue reading »

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