DVD Release
An oblivious city couple hit the open waters in an effort to “get away from it all” but quickly find themselves in danger when a storm rolls across the horizon and forces them onto a little, seemingly uninhabited, island. Forced inland they discover an old ramshackle farmhouse in which to take refuge but something’s just not right about this particular farm? Is it be the blow-up doll in the living room and the barn full of thousands of dollars in marijuana plants or could it be the three sex-starved thugs and their flesh-eating Rottweiler?
Ah, survival horror. Despite all of our bitching and whining that the genre never gets anything new; we still love these films dearly. They rarely ever bring anything new to the table nor do the characters really interest us. We watch survival horror because we love the hunt, the capture, the torture, rape and…naturally…the revenge. Obviously, we’re never truly satisfied until our victim (or victims) hands out a little payback but whether they do or do not, we’re still hooked.
Storm Warning was one such survival horror film that satisfies our lust for debaucherous bloodshed and brutality while simultaneously frustrating us with ridiculous, and near miraculous, sequences that could have been lifted from any random episode of MacGuyver. Isn’t that what makes these types of movies so goddamn fun though? We get an idiotic and useless “hero,” a frail heroine transformed into a guerilla fighter and three incestuous scumbags out for doom and poon. Does it get any better? I mean, what exactly are you expecting from a film like this? Depth? Brilliance? Inspired dialogue? C’mon, we want to see somebody that’s been sexually humiliated, possibly raped, spring back from shock to lop off some penis and kick ass and the heroine of Storm Warning does so in spades.
The acting, cinematography, score and gore are all admirable but not entirely memorable. I can’t see this being added to anybody’s “Favorites List” but it’s a worthwhile watch with some entertaining violence.
Storm Warning has great gore, nasty villains, an awesome flesh-eating guard dog and Nadia Farès’ gorgeous ass…’nuff said. If you go into this looking for a thought-provoking, socially redeeming masterpiece, you don’t know jack about survival horror. In my opinion this was better than The Hills Have Eyes 2 (2007), which for some of you may not be saying much, but it really did hold my interest from beginning to end. This comes recommended, be sure to rent first though.
