DVD Artwork
First things first, I just have to get this off my chest about something in Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers. What the hell is going on with Michael’s mask? Holy shit, that is one dodgy looking piece of head-ware. Not only have they given him a receding hairline that almost matches the late great Mr Pleasance’s, they have also given him the schnozzle from hell. I can well imagine that those masks get hot underneath, but I don’t expect them to hide the breathing apparatus inside the mask. Hell, you could fit some scuba gear inside this bad boy.
I can’t believe that no one on set during the filming of this movie piped up and said “You know what? That mask is crap” Did they honestly think that it looked good? Well, it’s in the past now, but please never let this mask be used ever again, anywhere.
The reason I mentioned this right at the very beginning of this review is simple. Regardless of whether I thought this was a decent flick or not, the one things that sticks in my mind the most was this awful bloody mask, and that can’t be a good thing.
Enough with that though, even though it has stained my mind now, and onto the movie itself. As Halloween 2 did, Halloween 5 begins with the ending of Part 4, so if you haven’t seen that installment I suggest you stop reading right about now.
After wrestling with Rachel Carruther’s (the returning Ellie Cornell) car, Michael Myers is pumped full of lead, falls down a mine shaft and is quickly followed down by a large amount of explosives. Of course he isn’t dead though, we all know by now that these killers are invincible once the screen writers come up with a semi-plausible way to bring them back.
In this case Michael ends up in a river just before the mine explodes. He is soon discovered by an old hermit who rather foolishly nurses the unfortunately masked Michael back to health.
This allows Michael to continue in his quest to kill of his niece Jamie (once again played by Danielle Harris). She is now in a hospital after attacking her mother with a carving knife, an attack brought on through her telepathic link with Michael.
Dr Loomis (Donald Pleasance) is soon on the scene as well and plans to use Jamie’s telepathic powers to find and ultimately destroy Michael before he can carve up what is left of Haddonfield.
Yeah, it’s all a little far fetched if you ask me, but that isn’t the only part of this movie that stretches the limits of what we will and won’t believe. The horrific 80′s fashion being one, the fact that Michael still remembers how to drive a car is another. I know it has been discussed many times, I just can’t quite get my head around this though. Where did he learn to do this? Did they have day release from the asylum? I need to know the answer to these questions.
The movie itself is an incredibly shallow, and for want of a better word, boring affair. Nothing really seems to move the story along, even in scenes that are supposed to be exciting. If you watch the accompanying featurette beforehand you might be led to believe that this will be an enjoyable horror yarn, you would be wrong though. The fact that the director even compares this to John Carpenter’s original is just laughable.
Apart from the weak script and run of the mill direction, there is also the terribly out of place comedy police officers that spoil what little momentum the movie has. Admittedly they only pop up a few times, it’s just a few times too many for this horror fan.
As for the cast? Donald Pleasance phones in a solid, if slightly over the top, performance of Dr Loomis. You have to give this man credit for the loyalty he showed to this series of movies. He is one area of the movie that will hold your attention. Apart from the late Mr Pleasance there is also a commendable performance from young Danielle Harris. Other than that the rest of the cast seems made up of rent-an-actor nobodies that either over act to the point of annoyance, yes I’m talking about you Wendy Kaplan (who sings and dances the role of Tina), or just fade away into the background never to be seen again.
Average would be a kind way to describe this movie, I’m not in a kind mood though as once again all that made an original movie so great has been stripped away in an attempt to further line the pockets of the producers, whilst giving the impression they are making a movie that fans want. The fans want good quality movies, if they must be sequels then the same effort should go into making them, not half arsed dross like this.
This release from Anchor Bay just about sums up the way the Halloween series has gone. Downhill and half-arsed. Yes, there is a commentary here, which even on a bad movie can be worth watching. There is also a short featurette that is fairly interesting to watch, especially the interview with the late Moustapha Akkad, who basically admits that this movie wasn’t much cop without saying quite as much. There isn’t much else here though, I suppose it got the treatment it deserved.
Overall, Halloween 5 isn’t the worst in the series, however it is far from the best. You may get some enjoyment from it if your expectation levels are very low, and horror with no scares, tension or excitement are your cup of tea.
